We Are All Ministers

Reading my brother's blog again and though my response was short, it is so true.  My wonderful husband has been battered over the years by "Well Intentioned Dragons"  The people of a church that cause so much heart-ache and destruction, by their "concerns."  They feel they have the right to say hurtful things to protect their friends or family members.  This "emotional vomit" is exactly why more "professional ministers" are leaving the ministry.  My response to Matt's thought of ministering where he is, was:

"Ooooh!  Yes, why is it that if we aren't pastors or missionaries, we think we aren't ministers?  What a glorious place to minister, when there is no financial reward for doing it!  We are changed in our thinking and treatment of people when there are financial strings attached. Strength of character tells us to say or do one thing, while our fear of rejection and support tell us to stay quiet!  Although I feel more "comfortable" sharing with those who know the Lord, that is the comfort zone that He asks us to leave, so we can share with the ones who need His hope, love and grace.

Everyday is an opportunity to minister, if only by example and a 'lifestyle evangelism.'" 

We can't only minister by lifestyle, but it's a start.  Look around you today, see what opportunities God is at work doing, be observant and speak up or be active and meeting needs around you.  We are all ministers!

Yikes, blogging?

OK, I've been reading my brother's blog.  I love hearing his thoughts and insights about his journey in his Christian walk.  I find myself relating and then sharing my thoughts and insights...silly me, three or four paragraphs later...I should be doing that on my blog.  So, as scary as that can be, (sharing yourself, openly) I thought I'd share some of my responses....

He was sharing about faith and have tenacity in your faith.  Great thoughts and then this came out of me...

It's funny, I am a planner about somethings, but with direction and "waiting," not anymore.  As soon as we plan something, God laughs.  He knows the outcome of these plans and we give Him credit for things He wants nothing to do with. 

We have filled our lives with "stuff" because we've been told (by people we don't even know ie. advertisers) that we need it. Stuff fills us, as well as our homes and time, with things that pull us away from what God really wants for us.  A simple, child-like faith that follows after Him without question or fear.  A love that wants to love Him back, to please and serve Him, just as a child does for their parents (when they're little anyway.)

We are people who are easily influenced by trends, people, and circumstances and forget the real priorities in life.  I love the faith I've grown into and I am still growing.  When Jim had his heart attack and surgery, I really had peace, I wasn't fearful of the surgery or what our future might be, I had peace. I wanted to share that with others in the hospital.  I thought about what if, (Satan always plays this game with us) and I was at peace.  Then I second guessed myself, thinking "does it show a lack of love and concern for Jim, that I'm not worried or scared?"  I thought-No it's God's peace.  He's in control and He's the one that decides if Jim's life will continue here or with Him eternally.  I can't do or change anything...so I have peace. I need to share this with people.  Why do we worry and fret and literally make ourselves sick over things we have no control?  I see this worry and concern about the world and all it's problems...we have no control of any of it.  We should be focused on the people around us, do they have hope and peace in their lives?  Ok I need to stop preaching to the choir...we all have ups and downs in growth...it's an adventure this life we live.

So, I guess I want to share too.  I just need a topic and even then I don't always stay on task, hey I like rabbits too!

Found a New Organization I like!

I love helping when I can and it isn't much these days, but "Skip1.org"  is one I can afford.  We all can. It's premise is that we can all skip something, a specialty coffee, a lunch out, a new shirt.  You get the idea.  I skipped Taco Bell for lunch the rest of February.  I figured at four lunches and aprox. $5 ea (that would include Caylynn's I would pay for.) So I sent them $20. They take whatever you normally would have spent...even a pack of gum for $1.25, whatever.  So check it out, again it's   skip1.org I think you'll feel as great as I did knowing you're feeding the homeless or children in a third world country.  V

Proof of Life Video

We had some funny messages from friends on facebook about Jim and his recovery.  One was doubting that Jim was really getting better because Jim's profile picture was still the one of the first week after leaving the hospital.  You know the one with him in the recliner with his blankie, the tv remote and his cup of tea.

 So I took a picture to prove he was better, losing weight and actually alive!  Well, the picture wasn't enough...what if that was an old picture, (nothing with a date on it) 



So Jim wanted me to put together a video of friends and family we visited after his surgery to prove he's alive and well.  So here it is:

Jim's September Event 2010-Heart Attack

Many of you know that in September Jim had a heart attack and a quintuple by-pass surgery.  I didn't even know you could have a quintuple 5, I had only heard of quadruple...I guess because I think of four chambers of the heart that there were only four arteries involved. This is the story from my perspective and memories, limited and distant as they are now!

On September 19th, Jim finished up his time with Paso Robles Community Church (P.R.C.C.). Their new pastor was officially there and this was his first Sunday.  We left with happiness for them and tearful for us as we had to say good-bye for now to dear friends.  But as a consolation, we were headed up to one of our favorite places for the week, Genesee Home.

Genesee is a retreat home for ministers and missionaries and their spouses.  This would be our third visit and the warmest one so far.  It would be a long from the central coast of California to the northeastern part of California.  It is in a little town of Taylorsville in the valley of Genesee just south east of Mount Lassen.  We were planning on seeing some old friends along the way and were looking forward to a time of reflection and renewal for us as individuals and as a couple.

On our way up, we stopped for lunch with our friends the Gertner's.  Luke and Rebecca had just had their third child and we wanted to see this sweet family

We arrived at Genesee around dinner I think.  Settled in, well we had been double booked, oops.
We were able to choose another room since there were only ourselves and one other couple.  So, this is now our next favorite room.  We were pretty tired so we went to bed fairly early.

 We had a great week, Jim always spends time in the prayer barn, early riser that he is this is where he retreats in the mornings.  It has a great view of the valley and is so warm and cozy.  Then there is also a extensive library to choose any number of wonderful books.

The Prayer Barn

The Library

Jim was also out biking and hiking 2-4 miles almost every morning! Beautiful location to enjoy God's creation and renew your spirit!   

We also got some time to drive up to Antelope Lake and have a picnic...







well, until the attack of the killer chipmunks...

They were very aggressive and brave.  Jim actually had to go out on the rocks to get away from them! People have obviously been feeding them.

Jim relaxing in the hammock

We were having a great time until Thursday morning before breakfast, Jim started having some discomfort in his right shoulder and neck.  He went down stairs for a while to rest then came back up and took a short cat nap.  He felt fine but decided to stick close to home, so we hung out in the hammock and played Sudoku.

out on our hike

No other pain the rest of the day...wonderful evening and then another great nights sleep.  Then it was Friday and time to pack up and go.  Jim was running all the luggage down and packed up the Jeep.  We had a picture taken and ate breakfast.  Then we climbed in the car said our good-byes and off we went.

 About ten minutes down the road Jim started having those same pains...only now it was also in his jaw.  I told him I should drive, so we changed places and headed down towards the junction.  We headed further down the hill and the he said that the pain was not subsiding so when we came to the fork in the road, we could go down 70 miles to Oroville or 10 miles to Quincy.  Fortunately there was a Highway Patrolman parked there at the turn so we went to ask if there were a hospital in Quincy and he said yes and asked if there were a problem.  Jim told him he was having chest pains.  He said he could call an ambulance, but we figured we could be there before they could get here and take him back.  He gave us directions and off we went.

We found the hospital by following an ambulance and looking for the hospital signs.  Jim got right in and hooked up.  They gave him nitro and some he started feeling better.  I made some phone calls to let our friends the Jarboes know we were at the hospital.  We called Genesee to let them know we may not make it down the hill and might need to stay another night.  After a while he was feeling normal and the e.k.g was normal, there was nothing to indicate he was having a heart attack.  They did take a blood test and when that came back, it said his enzyme level was elevated and he had had an event several hours ago. The test only shows what has happened much earlier, there's no way of knowing what was happening just an hour or two ago.  Meaning what was on the results were from the day prior, which was milder than today.  It was at that point the doctors confirmed Jim needed to go down the hill for better care. 


          So came the next adventure...Chico or Reno.  Well, that was easy for us because we have friends in Oroville and Paradise just a short trip from Chico.  But we were officially unemployed with no insurance, I could hear the $$$$ adding up. When they mentioned helicopter, I kept telling them....NO INSURANCE.  They said it was our only option because they had no idea how extensive the damage was or what might happen next or how soon.  So they order the helicopter and I waited...many asked if I was scared. No, I was still in shock and wondering how we were ever going to get out of debt.  Selfish I guess, but I knew Jim was in God's hands, he looked good and I couldn't doing anything about it anyway.  Why worry when Master of the Universe is in control of your future.  (That means $$$ too, Vanessa)  Our original Dr prayed with us before he left for the day.  We so greatly appreciated that, another reminder of God's presence and control.  So here's the helicopter...the highlight of the event for Jim...but worth the price?

Wheeling Jim to the copter

lift off

This was great for Jim he hasn't had a ride in a helicopter for many years and he got to be right up front with the pilot...

The helicopter ride was $24K at least that was the last estimate we received.

Jim arrived 30 minutes later, me I drove down the river and it took me 90 minutes.  When I arrived he was all hooked up to monitors and drips and his angiogram was scheduled for the next morning at 9am. Our friend Curt Jarboe came and stayed,  then our friends Kevin and Andi Skinner came.  Once visiting hours were over Curt took me home for the night. His family were so sweet and concerned and took great care of me.

Then in the morning Curt and I were off the the hospital for the test. Curt's father had just gone through this the previous year so Curt was well acquainted with the procedure. I got settled in the waiting area and was getting people caught up on Jim's condition online. Then about 30 minutes later the nurse came out and was telling us what we should do next...a little confusing until she asked if the doctor had been out to talk to us.  I said, no and she said she couldn't say anymore until he did.  Sure enough a few minutes later out came the cardiologist with the news....Jim had extensive blockage and would need by-pass surgery.  There were five maybe six blocked arteries and they needed to go into surgery immediately.   I started  packing up my stuff and then they rolled Jim out to go and prep him for surgery.  All I could say was "Wow"  I looked at Jim and he said the same thing...we were pretty much in shock.

All I could think of was why had there been no prior symptom?  Well, here's what happened.  Jim had found out a few years ago that his blood sugar was higher than it should be and that if he lost weight and exercised he could keep it under control.  Diabetes...well he did lose weight and changed his diet to the Atkins for a while.  He lost about 20 lbs and was walking occasionally.  Then he slipped back into certain patterns.  Although he was using Splenda and sweeteners and low sugar items...his carbohydrates picked up again.

 Then back in August I was so sick and at one point they wanted to check my blood sugar. We had a monitor at home so we did check mine and it was 126 after a meal that morning.  Then Jim checked his and his was 276, at that point he new it was time for a change.  That's the thing with diabetes, it sneaks up and damages your body quietly.  Because it damages your nerves, you don't feel pain.  Hummm.

Well, once we had the news it was time to tell everyone and get the prayers started.  I called the girls, our friends here in Paradise and as many family and friend I could.  I was a little nervous, but again I knew God was in control and that He wasn't done with Jim.  I did wonder if He was to take him home, what would I do.  Again, I wasn't worried, I knew I was in God's hands and that our futures were already planned.  I know there might have been thought as to whether my calmness was due to trust and faith in the Lord and great reputation of the hospital.  Or if some may have thought I didn't worry enough or show concern enough.  But my hope is in the Lord and even in this crisis, I trusted the Lord's plan.

We gathered in the lobby of the hospital (their designated waiting area) There were Curt, Kevin then Andi and then their pastor's wife Joanie Hamilton showed up with refreshments.  I got a call from Cristin saying that she, John, Corban and Caylynn were all coming.  Then later Glenda Jarboe came and relieved Curt so he could take a group of kids to a youth activity from church.  I felt so blessed and the conversations were so fun, getting caught up and sharing and getting acquainted with each other.  It kept my mind busy and there were prayers, it was wonderful for me. 

The liaison nurse came out periodically to keep us posted on Jim's progress.  After six hours he was being rolled into recovery.  It would still be a while before I could see him.  The girls had decided to come up together so Corban joined Cristin and John in Valencia, then they drove to Visalia on the 99 to pick up Caylynn (thanks Stella.)  John and the girls had a long drive and unfortunately Corban was supposed to be leaving for Paris the next day.  The timing was so off for her and trying to make a decision was over-the-top stressful.  She decided to check with her travel agent and she would able to get a later flight from Sacramento later after knowing her dad's condition.

I think I went in to see him in ICU around 5 or 6pm.  Things are a bit of a blur, but I know the kids got there later after visiting hours were over.  It was probably 9:30 or so, then they took turns going in to see Jim.  Unfortunately, he was still out.  They were supposed to have him up and sitting that evening, but they didn't.  So the kids saw him unconsciousness and all hooked up to machines...pretty overwhelming.  After the visits, we went home with the Jarboes and stayed the night.    

Glenda and Curt Jarboe

In the morning, they still had not taken him off the respirator and they said we couldn't really see him until after 1pm.  Wow, I was really wondering what was up with that.  But it gave me an opportunity to go to church with the Jarboes and worship.  It was a wonderful service and I felt God's presence all around me.  We left from to church and went back to the hospital.  We still had to wait.  When we finally saw him, all he could say was "I hate that tube,"  "I really hate that tube."  It was hard for him to talk but he looked so much better than I expected.  From that point on he progressed and did everything right on schedule.  They would tell us what to expect each day and that's exactly what would happen.  But he was up walking as much as they would let him, doing laps around the ICU, then they moved him to the next level and he'd walk laps around the entire floor.  "You can't keep a good man down."  John, Cristin and Caylynn went home on Monday.  John needed to get back to work.  Caylynn wanted to get the house ready for Dad's home coming.  Corban made arrangements to fly out from Sacramento on Tuesday morning so she stayed with me the rest of the day on Monday and we stayed with the Hamiltons.

Joanie and Gary Hamilton

Day 3 Corban & Jim

Corban's  flight was early, so getting her to the airport was a point of discussion. But then we were told that there was a shuttle from Chico, so she got the info and I took her to the pick up station.  It all went off without a hitch. She got to Paris then London and had a great time.
I spent the next few days with the Hamiltons, they were wonderful!  Added bonus, it was a shorter drive because they actually live in Chico vs. Oroville.

Day 5

Jim improved well enough to go home a day early, which I was not ready for.  We had decided to stay with the Skinners the week after being released from the hospital.  That way we could spread our love to each family without imposing for too long.  There were things to get ready for him to stay at home and the Skinners again, did a wonderful job of helping with this.  Jim needed to be where he could get up easily...a recliner.  I needed to be close enough to hear him if he needed anything at night...they moved a queen sized bed into the living room, not an air mattress, a box spring and mattress!  Amazing!  There were the meds to pick up and they weren't at the hospital, I needed to get my stuff from the Hamiltons, get his meds and get him home before he was too tired to sit up any longer.  Kevin, bless his heart took on the hunt for the pharmacy and picking up the long list of medications and paraphernalia Jim needed.  It was crazy, but it worked out!  Praise the Lord for amazing friends...Here are the Skinners and their adjustments they made for us.

Kevin and Andi Skinner

the Skinner home

Jim in the recliner...TV remote and tea 

here's the queen bed they put across the hall for me      

These wonderful people fed us and took great care of us for 9 days...we couldn't have asked for more.  We saw Jim's endocrinologist, his heart surgeon and the cardiologist before we left October 9th. Jim was doing great and  healing well.



The Lord blessed us so much through all of this He showed us why there was no job lined up for Jim after finishing at PRCC...he couldn't have followed through with it after a heart surgery.  We couldn't have qualified for Med-Cal if he had been employed.  (And thank you California for paying the bills for this expensive event in our lives.)  He showed me why I was so sick in August...if I had not experienced the sickness from meds, nausea, food tasting so bad, smells getting me sick, not being able to care for my needs like getting up and down from sitting or laying down and exhaustion....I could not have been the  nurse I needed to be for Jim.  I understood all the reactions and feeling helpless.  He showed us we were to totally depend on Him and His people.  He showed me when I was sick, the little things to let me know He was there and taking care of not just my needs but the little wishes like banana pudding, champagne grapes and a trip to refresh at Genesee.  He gave us the perfect place to be taken care of for not just one week at Genesee, but also at one of the best hospitals for cardiac patients and then close to great, godly friends who showed us Christ's love through their lives and sacrifices.  What a great God we have who knows the big picture and has us in the palm of His hand.  Who or what could I fear.

Jim is back at work at Niblick Road Baptist Church of Paso Robles.  He's been there since the 1st of January and will continue through at least April as their interim pastor.  He is challenged in different ways as an "interim" and not as an "intentional interim."  I am planning on going with him a couple times a month and giving him the attention he needs.  We are both trying to eat better and exercise more.  Safe to say he's doing a much better job.  He's lost about 25 lbs since the surgery and me?  Well, nothing.  Please keep praying for me too!  We are considering starting a nutrition and weight loss class...he needs to be the spokes person for diabetes and heart disease.  He's almost 57 and he could have been dead but for the grace of God.  He is alive and seeking what the next thing God wants for him and our family.

Here we are at Ventura  Harbor

Just remembering what we used to look like, LOL

Here's a video collection

I thought I'd post a few more of my videos.  Please let me know if enjoy them.  I know I need to change them up a little, they tend to be a little too similar.

This was a gift to my friends at First So Baptist, Porterville, because it has many faces of the children and grandchildren  of my friends.  The song is called "My Father's Heart" and shares the Love God has for us his children.  I put it together for my friend Ashley, because as talented and gifted a singer she is, she gets nervous when she does a solo so I did with her background CD so she could sing with this playing behind her.  It helps to take some of the focus off the singer and on the video.  Great idea Ashley.

The next one is "While You Were Sleeping" and what a message of the numbness and lack of awareness we have had through the ages.  America is lulled by it's comfort and selfishness into a dangerous sleep that will be it's death if we don't wake up and pay attention.  This particular one is on wealth as our distraction, but also did one on sports and leisure showing how preoccupation with sports can pull us away from focusing on God and the hurting world.

This one is called "Revelation Song" now a Christian favorite on the radio, it's message is strong and clear about Christs return. our Holy Lamb of God, the King of Kings and Lord of Lords. How He deserves our everlasting praise and awesome worship!

Have ever had a big puzzle with like 1000 pieces or more.  It's so challenging to put it together but when it's complete, wow, so amazing!  Now have you ever found a puzzle piece all by itself, not one you've seen in a while and you just have not idea with what puzzle it belongs.  Well, that's the premise of this next song.  God knows the big picture all we get is one piece at a time.  It's so hard to see what our lives will look like it's a mystery until God puts our pieces together to make a wonderful Masterpiece:) He gives "Meaning to this Mystery."

This next one is a touching song of how precious it would be to have lived and been part Jesus and his life here on earth.  "Wish" takes you from infancy to resurrection.  Do you wish you had been there when he took his first step, walked on the water, fed the 5000+ and died for you?  Or to be so heart broken that watched his death, but then meet him three days later on the road? Enjoy this heartfelt song, "Wish."

This one is a fun, up beat but has a great message about getting so caught up in the frustrations of the day we forget to remember to count our blessings!  "This is the Stuff" is a great reminder!

This is the last one for this post.  It was a fun song by Kristin Chenowith that Caylynn and used to sing in the car to.  "Taylor the Latte Boy" does bring joy and laughter.  Listen to the words, forgive the repetitiveness of the pictures.  It was a little tough to find a large group of baristas.

Well here I am after a few years...I thought I'd use this more, but facebook has been my communication highway of choice. I have a new hobby/ministry that I wanted to share with anyone who cares, that is music videos. I love music and I have always heard songs and thought I could just picture images to go with it...so here I am hoping to post them here as well as on facebook.  This is my latest one called "Lead Me to the Cross" by Francesca Battistelli: